| remember me?? |
[Dec. 4th, 2005|08:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  rejected | ] |
| [ | music |
| | christmas music | ] |
I was reading everyone else's journals and I just had the urge to write. Mostly it's because I have two finals tomorrow and I am absolutely sick of studying. Only 30 more minutes until Desperate Housewives and Grey's, yay! I hope that I get to hang out with everyone that I haven't seen in forever over christmas break. We will be partying and playing lots of beer pong here at my house so everyone will be invited! Theresa and I put lights on our house and we got a christmas tree and it's beautiful. I am so ready for school to be out. I just need to survive these next four days.
Life kind of sucks right now but what can you do. Just wait it out until something good comes along. It will. I just don't know when. All things familiar for the past two years are now gone and replaced by nothing but emptiness as of yet. But that's what I need to change. The voids will be filled eventually. I guess that's life.
Anyways, I might keep writing in the future if time allows. I really hope everyone can survive the remainder of the semester. We are getting so old, it's hard to believe. I am going to start a fire in the fireplace now to keep me warm while I watch tv and avoid studying for the next couple of hours. Until we meet again... |
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| let it be... |
[Apr. 10th, 2005|11:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the hum of the library | ] |
I made the stunning realization today that I have been freaking out lately about everything and that it's pretty much sucks. So I've decided to try to revert to how I used to be and just take things in as they come. School, clincals, work, homework...these things are not the end of the world and this is my life so I might as well try to make the most of it. I'm not feeling very motivated about school but it's almost over. Does anyone else not feel like an adult yet? Thank God I'm still only 19 and can at least claim teenagerism but damn, when is this amazing transition into "womanhood" going to happen. When are we all going to find that one person and get married and have kids and how weird is that going to be? I find life to be quite intriguing.
I ran ten miles yesterday in the Papa John's race. That's a good way to get you thinking about life. Sometimes I want to cry out of happiness at those races because this is the place where I see the good in humanity. Thousands of people come together in this place with the same goal, which is simply to finish this race, whatever one it may be. Along the way, people line the roads cheering you on and telling you how great you are doing. They clap and yell and play pump up music from their front porches or cars and watch you go by. If you're feeling like you can't go on, people pick you up and tell you to keep going and that you can do this. When you cross the finish line, they announce your name whether you are first or 921 and make you feel as if noone else has ever done this before and you are a better person because of it. All of these people possess an energy and a spirit that is so strong you can feel it. Well,you know, I like it and if you like to run you should do it too but I don't recommend running ten miles without training because it doesn't feel very good the next day.
So anyways, I decided that I missed writing useless rambling journals about useless things that are going to make people wonder what I've been smoking today. So, I've had my fix and it's about time for me to get off work now so I'm going to go to John's and fold my laundry. I hope everyone has a good week and good luck with the final weeks of school. I know it's not easy. |
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| shoot me now |
[Feb. 23rd, 2005|10:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  groggy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "and i may hate myself in the morning..." | ] |
What else is there to do when you are hungover on a Wednesday and you don't feel like doing homework?
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| I'm still here |
[Jan. 30th, 2005|11:03 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  gloomy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | John Mayer | ] |
Another long night working at the library and I thought I would update. I do read these and keep up with everyone else's lives but just never feel compelled to write. But of course, tonight, when I have so much homework to do, I feel like updating. I had a fun weekend but successfully screwed up lots of things in my life and now I'm just not feeling too great about things. I have an insane schedule which makes me want to just sleep forever and forget about everything, but I try to get through it one day at a time. I miss everyone and hope that you all are surviving the semester and having a lot of fun. Jenna, I love the song you posted, it's one of my favorites.
Midnight
Lock all the doors
And turn out the lights
Feels like the end of the world
This sunday night
There's not a sound
Outside the snow's coming down
And somehow I can't seem to find
The quiet inside my mind |
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| missing you... |
[Jun. 20th, 2004|02:10 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sad | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Ben Harper | ] |
Well, I hope everyone had a good father's day. I spent mine at home with the family but it's been a rough couple of days for us so it wasn't that exciting. Sorry to those of you I talked to on Friday about going to the picnic. My phone ended up dying and I couldn't get a hold of anyone so I just went home and went to bed. But SB and I went up there last night and worked at the candy booth and saw a bunch of girls that I hadn't seen in forever so that was nice. So I'm just staying in tonight taking it easy b/c I partied a little too much last night and I'm tired. Gotta wake up in the morning and go running.
This many miles might as well be the moon
It's a desolate place and I'm missing you
My heart can't believe what my eyes they have seen
God knows what's pulling us through
In a world gone insane, I've whispered your name
I'm missing you |
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| It's been a while... |
[May. 31st, 2004|05:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  restless | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Ben Harper | ] |
Well, I'm just chilling at home tonight doing some laundry and thought I might update for no good reason. I have been completely worthless for the past month now because my job doesn't start until the week after next. I'm going to be coaching soccer camps every week all around the state. I'm excited b/c it's going to be a fun and easy job. I need money really really bad. I'm going to Florida next week with my family and I think I am going to go deep sea fishing which should be an experience. Other than that, I've just been hanging out and partying every once in a while and also trying to get in shape for soccer b/c preseason is a bitch. If I'm in shape, it will at least ease the pain a little bit.
I really hope that everyone is doing well and having a fun summer so far. Hopefully our paths will cross soon and we can hang out some time. I'm always up for anything. Anyways, I'm outa here to go check on my laundry. |
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| New Years |
[Dec. 29th, 2003|02:22 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Howie Day | ] |
Well, I had an awesome New Year's Eve this year. First Theresa and I went to Rodfest which was absolutely crazy. That was okay for like five minutes but we got out of there after a while b/c there were just way too many people and you couldn't move. But it was still good to see lots of people that I hadn't seen in a while. So after that we headed over to Laura's, my brothers girlfriends house who was throwing a party for my brother b/c he turned 21 at midnight. My brother finally got drunk for the first time! It was an awesome party, just drinking and playing games and having a good time. I would say it ranks as my most fun New Years thus far. But now I am sort of sick with a bad cough and I think I have the flu which is not fun at all. Hopefully I will get better soon, I hate being sick.
http://www.sbrown01.com/newyear2004/newyear2004-Pages/Image28.html
http://www.sbrown01.com/newyear2004/newyear2004-Pages/Image26.html
http://www.sbrown01.com/newyear2004/newyear2004-Pages/Image11.html |
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| when it comes to december it's obvious why, noone wants to be alone at christmastime |
[Dec. 26th, 2003|01:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  scared | ] |
| [ | music |
| | John Mayer | ] |
Well, my Christmas was pretty good. Just spent it with the family which can get a little boring after a while. It didn't feel like Christmas at all to me though. I can't wait until New Years and until my school friends come back in town. I'm getting very bored.
staying home alone on a Friday
flat on the floor looking back
on old love
or lack thereof
after all the crushes have faded
and all my wishful thinking was wrong
I'm jaded
I hate it
I'm tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
so tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
searching all my days to find you
not sure what I'm looking for
I'll know where
when I see you
until then I'll hide in my bedroom
just staying up all night just to write
a love song
for no one
I'm tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
so tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
could I have missed my chance and watched you walk away
I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
could I have missed my chance and watched you walk away
I'm tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
so tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
you'll be so good
you'll be so good for me
I know you'll be so good
for me
for me |
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| Winds of change |
[Dec. 15th, 2003|05:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | John Mayer | ] |
It's hard to believe that I have already survived my first semester in college. Good luck to those of you taking finals this week. You will survive. It feels like it just began but so much has happened in between, both good and bad. I'm excited to see everyone when they come back but I already miss being at the dorm and seeing everyone and not having to tell my parents where I am all the time, etc. It's nice to have a break. I have been doing a lot of changing and growing in the past couple of weeks and trying to figure things out so I need this time away from everything so I can decide what I need to do with myself. My life is confusing and scary right now. Things aren't bad, just different and I'm trying to adjust. My family went on Christmas Retreat this weekend at Mount Saint Francis and it looked absolutely amazing in the snow. It always does but I forget. It's the best place to just get away and think.
So this is only my first day off and I'm already kind of bored. I guess I will go Christmas shopping tomorrow when I get paid. Good luck on finals everyone, hope to see you soon! |
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| word of advice: don't play beer pong with whiskey!!! |
[Nov. 12th, 2003|04:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  busy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I'm Still Here | ] |
These next two weeks are going to be so crazy. I have so much stuff to do and I'm just so tired. I have come to the conclusion after getting two bad test grades back that I need to party a little less and study a little bit more. It's just all catching up to me right now. I've been working really hard this week though and I hope that it's all going to pay off. I can't wait until Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks.
Right now I'm sitting at work and I am so incredibly bored. I've already been here for three and a half hours but it feels like forever. After this I have to go babysit. I have had a nonstop day since seven this morning and it's not even close to being over. After babysitting I have a floor meeting and then lots of homework. College is just great. I am having a flashback to Assumption b/c I'm making notecards for my research paper, ahhh!!!! Although I have to say they really did prepare us well. I went back there the other day to pick up my yearbook and Mrs. Foldyna called me Sara Beth. She always gets us confused. Oh well. Well, I'm gonna go grab some dinner and then head over to watch four cute little girls. Have a good day! |
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emmers920's journal